Options

KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK

Tears gliding down my face, I open the door to see two policemen;
They say come with us,
There are no options here.

To the hospital we go,
Me, shamefully revealing myself to the nurse,

Hmmm, attempted overdose, they say, come with us,
There are no options here.

Hooked up to monitors that buzz and beep,
I lay silently in the bed, thinking of that which I did wrong.

Drink this charcoal, the nurse says,
There are no options here.

You won’t have to speak to anyone, he says.
Contradicted hours later, I weep.
There are no options here.

I wait all night to see a doctor, a doctor of my own.
Psychiatrist says I can go home.. Though I am not okay to be on my own.
Bawling my eyes out I tell the truth,

Psychiatrist says I must go downstairs,
There are no options here.

To the acute psychiatric unit, I go alone.
Frantic, I beg for rights, I beg for normalcy,
Some normalcy granted. Not enough.

I pray thanks to a God though I'm not sure which one, while holding spite, for I know,
There are no options here.

I cry all night long, 

Meet people the next day.
Meds change, meds change, meds change
There are no options here.

I feel drugged, but when I don’t, I wish not to live,
There are no options here.

Finally stable, I am near expulsion,
I have to once again face the real world,
I’ve got to go about it on my own.
There are no options here.