One Year, Three Months

The hard part of sobriety is that
I never know how much I love it
Until I’m deeply intoxicated

The hard part of sobriety is that
I have to guess my limits,
Sometimes accidentally crossing them

The hard part of sobriety is that
It is a solid yellow line I should not cross
But there are exceptions to every rule

The hard part of sobriety is that
I have to decide which part is hardest--
And there is no right answer

An Introduction To:

I whirr past my fellow classmates
Eager to begin the day
Monday morning crisp air

Enthusiastic teacher,
Reassures us, sarcastically,
As if it were her first language
No one seems to mind

I start to open,
Guard let down,
The students accept me
I am a part of something

Dance, sing, act; perform
Adorned in peoples impressions of you
She says exaggeration;
I say your true emotion

Red Ink

Teacher
Slowly reaches past me
I flinch,
Knowing hidden strength
Hides in the ink of his pen
Red; correcting my ill poem
Remedying my fatal mistake

I cringe in fear, 
A coward. 

A child afraid of needles,
My mind screams; terror

Teacher
Slowly reaches past me,
I stand still; prey.
Try not to shake.
I tell myself slowly
This is not abuse

Medicine

Swishhhhh
Water trickles
Down her throat;
Taking with it,
Five pills.

Swishhhhh;
Vitamins

Shortly thereafter,
A lump in her
Throat

Questioning
Will her future
Look the same?

My Cold Friend

Privacy,
I awake;
Shake
Demons
From my
Back

Privacy,
Let’s me
Be alone

Privacy,
Kisses me
On the cheek
Tucks me in

10 Things That Make Me Sad

1.       I will not have my great grandmother at my wedding

2.       I have a mama who is sick, but takes care of others before herself

3.       I will never be the youngest to do something

4.       I might not be remembered

5.       I have at times, too little, or too much fear

6.       I will not marry my first love

7.       I take more from life than I give

8.       I have never seen a shooting star

9.       I can’t control the future

10.   I will never write the perfect poem